The Homework Battle

Wish you could get some help with homework? Are you tired of spending an hour arguing with your child over 15 minutes of homework?

I get it! As a mom of 2 teens and a teacher for 15 years, I have been in your shoes. They aren’t very comfortable. In fact, I remember thinking that if my child told me one more time “that’s not how my teacher does it” I was going to lose it… I’m a teacher for crying out loud! So trust me, I know how you’re feeling and I promise that it can get better.

Turning the Battlefield into Neutral Territory

One of the biggest reasons why kids don’t want to do homework is that they have already been in school ALL DAY! There are so many things at home that they would rather do and I don’t blame them! The key here is to understand what they’re going through and turn homework into neutral territory.

Step1 ~ Empathize… it goes a long way

Showing empathy towards your child will go a long way in turning the battlefield into neutral territory. As adults, we don’t want to come home from work only to have to do more work. Let your kid know that you get it and that you understand their frustration. This will go a long way with them!

Step 2 ~ Explain the benefits

I’m going to give you insider information here straight from the teacher. Homework is simply practice to help increase confidence. This shouldn’t be a secret from your child. Be honest and let them know that it’s important to practice the skills that they learn each day because that helps the brain make it more automatic.

In my classroom, I often illustrated this in class by comparing it to an outside activity that the kids do. If you want to get better at dance or basketball or swimming, you have to practice. It’s the same with school. If you want to get better at math, practice your math! If you want to get better at reading, read more often! When I explain this in my classroom, kids are generally more apt to complete the homework because innately they want to do better in their studies.

Step 3 ~ Come to an agreement

It’s important that everyone gets on the same page in terms of a homework habit. When you do your homework Monday – Thursday without complaint then on the weekend you can ____. I know that it seems like bribery and I guess I’m okay with that. We all do something for the reward (whether intrinsic or extrinsic)… you go to work for the paycheck, think of the reward as your kiddos “paycheck”! 

When you come to an agreement, then write it down and post it wherever your child does their homework! If you don’t have a homework space, check out my free guide on creating a homework space your child will love!

That’s it!  To help reduce the amount of fighting over homework follow those three steps and you’ll soon find more peaceful evenings on the horizon! Pro Tip… at our house we actually all agreed to a “homework” time so during that time the house was nice and quiet and my husband and I either worked on something we had to do from school or read a book. It totally minimized distractions!

Here’s the short version to keep track in your head:

1. Empathy goes a long way. Make sure they know that you understand why they’re upset and don’t feel that homework is fair.
2. Explain the benefits. Your child should understand what’s in it for them! Practice makes them a better student and will make class easier.
3. The agreement. Work together to find some activity that they really like to do on the weekend and that’s their reward for 4 nights of complaint-free homework.

I hope that this helps to turn the battles in your house into a peaceful hour of work. Did this help? Leave a comment below and show some love by sharing this article with your friends.